tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-528074983146803930.post5416808037293965934..comments2024-03-06T08:29:13.333-08:00Comments on stuff white people do: believe others consider them trustworthymacon dhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07795547197817128339noreply@blogger.comBlogger21125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-528074983146803930.post-9877032505525291922012-10-17T23:53:35.051-07:002012-10-17T23:53:35.051-07:00I just discovered your blog and you are doing a gr...I just discovered your blog and you are doing a great service by speaking to your people on these issues. I know you said that you're taking a break. I encourage you to come back. The salvation of some of your people will depend on people like yourself who are trying to uncover the truth and show others things they do not normally see or even want to see. For you (being a white person) having come this far in your personal journey of awareness is indeed a breath of fresh air! TRUEDAUGHTERhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13379630818949770700noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-528074983146803930.post-62880454854557591332012-10-01T22:42:57.043-07:002012-10-01T22:42:57.043-07:00As a woman of color, I'm somtimes been approac...As a woman of color, I'm somtimes been approached by white guys who I in turn felt an attraction an towards. But I can't help but wonder if he's just interested in me because of my race, or because he sees me as "exotic," (or a fetish) or even if he does or will associate me with racial and sexual stereotypes. I also wonder if he would eventually leave me due to him perceiving me as inferior.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-528074983146803930.post-76791683716473919642009-09-30T16:50:27.031-07:002009-09-30T16:50:27.031-07:00Spruce, a LOT of us here are white, including the ...Spruce, a LOT of us here are white, including the author of the blog (me), and otherwise non-black. <br /><br />Please read more carefully. No one's hating white folks here. Not to speak for non-white people, but if a lot of non-white people have learned that it's best to withhold their trust from new white people, wouldn't you (if you're white) like to know why and how they've learned that?macon dhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07795547197817128339noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-528074983146803930.post-22383671236399550222009-09-30T16:44:54.240-07:002009-09-30T16:44:54.240-07:00You are all close minded, ethnocentric idiots whos...You are all close minded, ethnocentric idiots whose lives revolve around being black and proud! You aren't the only minority group in America, and minority groups don't only consist of people of different colors, there are different religions, GLBT, and the list goes on, no one fits in so suck it up and by god, remember that we are all individuals and just because you met a white person that wasn't trustworthy, that doesn't mean we are all the same, everyone is different and you seem to forget that when you put people in categories. So go make some white friends or something.Sprucenoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-528074983146803930.post-66560222101807960272008-06-09T17:18:00.000-07:002008-06-09T17:18:00.000-07:00LOL @ anonymous.I feel the same way as saraspeakin...LOL @ anonymous.<BR/><BR/>I feel the same way as saraspeaking.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-528074983146803930.post-58958966670106276752008-06-09T16:31:00.000-07:002008-06-09T16:31:00.000-07:00Bianca asked a few comments back about other poc p...Bianca asked a few comments back about other poc perspectives, so I figured I'd offer my own two cents as a biracial Pinay woman. <BR/><BR/>I don't trust white people in some very specific areas. Having been raised by my white father in a largely white-dominated environment, I suspect that I don't harbour quite the same level of mistrust other poc do of white people - I generally expect that they'll be nice and polite, and that they're probably good people. <BR/><BR/>But I do not trust them not to be racist, simply because most white people do not understand race as a concept or poc as people. Society has taught them that being colourblind is the best they can do, and so they never explore the ways in which skin privilege and cultural differences can lead to a system of race-based oppression and a completely different way of seeing the world than the way they see it. And of course, when faced with the fact that their perspective, while privileged, is not the only one - they insist that everyone else must simply be wrong, because <I>they've</I> never had problems, etc., and aren't we all just overreacting? Gosh. <BR/><BR/>I mean, I like white people. Half of my family is white. My primary partners are white, their families are white, etc. There are a lot of them in my life. And yet, each and every one of them, even the people I love best in the world, can still be racist. And that's why I don't trust white people, on the whole, to not be racist.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-528074983146803930.post-88736320567572961292008-06-09T03:41:00.000-07:002008-06-09T03:41:00.000-07:00In my travels, I have found that the best way for ...In my travels, I have found that the best way for me to not offend people of color with my whiteness is to not associate with them at all in social settings, etc.<BR/><BR/>This greatly reduces the chances of being misunderstood or mistrusted. People of color love being accommodated, and I don't mind sacrificing interaction with them by accommodating them when I can.<BR/><BR/>Like when I'm walking down a sidewalk and there is a black fellow walking towards me from the opposite direction, I will gladly cross to the other side, so as not to inflict the situation with awkwardness of my being white-this way he can maintain his sense of well being. Or if I am leaving a store, I will try to hide my purse so that a black fellow can't see it, so he doesn't think I'm high and mighty trying to have a nice bag. His feelings are spared in this situation, which is paramount above all else.<BR/><BR/>Sometimes I will see people of color who walk around in numbered night gowns and their pants belted to their knees. I try not to make eye contact out of worrying that my whiteness may cause me to feel mistrusted in that situation-again this should be avoided if necessary. <BR/><BR/>Thank you so much for such a fine article. :)Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-528074983146803930.post-83167376686273573982008-06-08T21:40:00.000-07:002008-06-08T21:40:00.000-07:00Renee, Your post is heartwrenching. The circumstan...Renee, <BR/><BR/>Your post is heartwrenching. <BR/><BR/>The circumstances in which I have disappointed black friends or acquaintances have been heartbreaking to me and to them...<BR/><BR/>Sometimes it's due to a misunderstanding, and I try to disentangle the threads of how the misunderstanding got all knotted up. <BR/><BR/>Sometimes that brings clarity for both, and sometimes it knots things up more.<BR/><BR/>I will always keep untying knots to see whatever ugly truth, or misunderstood lack of truth, is being seen about me, if the other person will keep untying the knots also.<BR/><BR/>At the last volunteer job I had, I was one of two white people and three black people tutoring there, and I said to the two black women when just women were talking --<BR/><BR/>"please tell me if I ever do or say anything culturally white supremacist/racist. I want you to call me on anything. I have been burned and hurt recently by some experiences of being I think misunderstood, but it has made me want to say this."<BR/><BR/>The older woman looked at me incredulously and said, "believe me, I will tell you."<BR/><BR/>It was awkward, and I didn't know if it seemed racist to say it, or good to say it. <BR/><BR/>I'd never done that before. I don't know how she felt about it.<BR/><BR/>I really came to respect her in so many ways, and she was really straightforward. She never told me I said or did anything culturally white supremacist/racist, but I do know she would have -- and with honesty between us, we could have worked anything out, I felt.Karenhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08222691585701927490noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-528074983146803930.post-64609321181878158872008-06-08T19:44:00.000-07:002008-06-08T19:44:00.000-07:00I will admit to having a certain level of distrust...I will admit to having a certain level of distrust of whites. Even those that I have chosen to call my friend I always suspect that one day they will disappoint me and show that they still internalize many negative things about black or other POC. It has been my experience that they often due. This is also a conversation that I never have with any of my white friends. I find that they are quick to see racism in others but slow at owning their own.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-528074983146803930.post-67448725080709698702008-06-08T15:04:00.000-07:002008-06-08T15:04:00.000-07:00I'm a light complected white man with light colore...I'm a light complected white man with light colored hair. When I was a kid, someone showed me that all of the villains in Mexican comic books looked like me. That has given me a lot to think about.Your driverhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06406948739451124566noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-528074983146803930.post-80337432529594052982008-06-06T14:36:00.000-07:002008-06-06T14:36:00.000-07:00Yes and no, jw. Do you?Yes and no, jw. Do you?macon dhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05265182025648127257noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-528074983146803930.post-36345941935603821852008-06-06T14:10:00.000-07:002008-06-06T14:10:00.000-07:00Macon, a question please: Do you trust white peopl...Macon, a question please: Do you trust white people?Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-528074983146803930.post-9542902658557025242008-06-05T10:34:00.000-07:002008-06-05T10:34:00.000-07:00Great post, Macon.Been reading for a while, and th...Great post, Macon.<BR/><BR/>Been reading for a while, and this one has probably hit closest to my experience at a predominately white college. While I'm a very friendly and personable person, I'm not quick to become close friends with people and I do often keep white people at arms length. I had one of my white guy friends try to tell me that I shouldn't make assumptions about others in such a way, and at first I agreed with him, and then I decided that his stance was rooted in his privilege because he doesn't have to assume things about white people to protect himself.<BR/><BR/>Anyways, thanks for the insight!She's Still Thinkinghttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08214478284155651420noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-528074983146803930.post-15765420428364545002008-06-04T19:01:00.000-07:002008-06-04T19:01:00.000-07:00As always, a wonderful topic to ponder, stretch, a...As always, a wonderful topic to ponder, stretch, and grow from...Bugettehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10384310957845316117noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-528074983146803930.post-1716038236430893742008-06-04T18:13:00.000-07:002008-06-04T18:13:00.000-07:00Okay, that whole description you wrote of the man ...Okay, that whole description you wrote of the man at the beginning of the article was priceless. I'm still laughing now. Like, I just can't with this one; I didn't even read it I just came here to type this while laughing my ass of. Imma go read it now though.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-528074983146803930.post-82049542685793023892008-06-04T15:39:00.000-07:002008-06-04T15:39:00.000-07:00Macon, I do not know if you covered it in a previo...Macon, <BR/><BR/>I do not know if you covered it in a previous topic, but there is a wonderful movie called Color of Fear. It is a documentary that is powerful and discusses the experiences of individuals from different cultural backgrounds and how we all exist in a society that privileges(sp) whites.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-528074983146803930.post-88957083713247361312008-06-04T13:55:00.000-07:002008-06-04T13:55:00.000-07:00It's definitely Los Angeles, bianca. I like to thi...It's definitely Los Angeles, bianca. I like to think I have a (one of a million) unique perspective on this. See, I'm one of those half-whites who looks white. So from the system, from education, and from social prejudice, I'm treated as white male. So I benefit from the privilege. However, I also know what it's like on the other side of the spectrum, being raised by my mexican american mother and occasionally seeing how my cousins live. So I'm equally racist in my prejudices to whites, latinos, blacks, and asians. That type of equality allows me to distance myself from the prejudicial mentality and get some objectivity.<BR/><BR/>One thing I've always noticed is how no other white people I know are not afraid of police officers. This confounds me, as I always have been. Doesn't matter how nice they are or how ambivalent they are to me, there's just a built in fear.<BR/><BR/>There are plenty of other examples, but also, pushing this article as "white vs black" instead of multi-racial relations is probably what makes people think you're anti-white.Unknownhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04380102045538770830noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-528074983146803930.post-77081965938466526072008-06-04T13:16:00.000-07:002008-06-04T13:16:00.000-07:00Thanks Bianca, good question! I know less about mi...Thanks Bianca, good question! I know less about mistrust of whites from other racial/cultural perspectives because I've never heard or read anyone other than a black person address this issue. Maybe you or others could fill us in on that?Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-528074983146803930.post-68815202464273965602008-06-04T13:05:00.000-07:002008-06-04T13:05:00.000-07:00What about Asians and Latinos? Racial communicatio...What about Asians and Latinos? Racial communication isn't a two way street with black people and white people on opposite sides of the double yellow line. It's a conglomeration of multi-lane highways, often fraught with bumper-to-bumper traffic or high-speed car chases. Or maybe that's just in LA.<BR/><BR/>Aside from that, good observations!Bianca Reaganhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04367735763877953363noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-528074983146803930.post-55434255266211692312008-06-04T11:17:00.000-07:002008-06-04T11:17:00.000-07:00Most white people I've encountered aren't too conc...Most white people I've encountered aren't too concerned about earning my trust or why I may not trust them. I think I would make an extra effort to reach out to those who were concerned about this matter because it demonstrates some level of caring. Unfortunately, I have to agree with McCall that most white people I know don't put themselves in a position in which they can know me on a more personal level. So, yes, I do find myself placing whites into categories of typical and atypical, albeit unconsciously. The behaviors that I regard as typical are when white people speak to me authoritatively and condescendingly, no matter their expertise on a subject, and when whites (particularly white women) overdo it with the politeness thing by being sickeningly sweet. It's painfully obvious in such exchanges that the white person I'm dealing with is essentially performing an act. White Canadian author Margaret Atwood has a great short story that chronicles the kind of act white people put on when faced with a person from "another culture," as she puts it. It's called "The Man from Mars" and is part of a collection called Dancing Girls. <BR/>Macon, some of your readers have asked about identifying admirable white people, and I most definitely give a head nod to M. Atwood. She's a social activist as well as an author and very on point in her descriptions of women, race, masculinity, etc. <BR/>Lastly, I want to add that maybe the most painful thing about being able to see through the performances whites put on for people of color is that it can be incredibly alienating when you feel that you're the only one who is aware that such an act is being performed, that someone is being condescending, duplicitous, etc., to you because of your race, and the witnesses to the act seem completely blind.Nadrahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14951831611030681223noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-528074983146803930.post-31054708125273116442008-06-04T05:46:00.000-07:002008-06-04T05:46:00.000-07:00Pretty good. History is a powerful teacher. Let ...Pretty good. <BR/><BR/>History is a powerful teacher. Let a white person know you bought a new house or car or scored higher on the exam than they did and watch out! You might be on the next layoff list, find yourself with the crap assignments or find a whole classroom of people no longer speaking to you...<BR/><BR/>Better to be polite and keep your business to yourself.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.com